Barry Twyford is coming to that London

Eeeeh. London.

barry_twyford-webBARRY TWYFORD is coming to the Museum of Comedy in Bloomsbury on the 26th of November with his unintentional show BARRY TWYFORD ISN’T MEANT.

‘Superb, inventive comedy’ – Stage

‘Former Viz man, as funny with a microphone in his hand as he was with a pencil’ – Guardian

More info and tickets HERE.

Simon Donald, of Viz Comic fame, performs as his most popular character, the hapless market researcher Barry Twyford, whose surveys often pose more questions than they answer. An endearing and loveable idiot, Barry spends the whole show desperately trying to find ways to entertain the crowd. In his inimitable floundering style, he has attempted to gain the venue’s permission to perform an exit survey of the audience, but instead has accidently booked himself to perform an hour of comedy. A terrified Twyford attempts to use the internet to find someone, anyone to help him, whilst online he has some bizarre face-to-face encounters with a number of Donald’s outrageous character creations.


More Bus-Tours and Upcoming Gigs

The Tyne Idols HIM OFF THE VIZ Bus Tour (details in post below this one) proved so popular that another was arranged immediately for 12th October. That proved so popular that it also sold out. But don’t fret, another has been organised for the 16th and is also selling fast, so get you tickets at £15 by visiting or call 0191 253 1618.

If you can’t make the bus tour I’ll be at the World’s finest comedy club, The Stand Newcastle, on all the days between; Thursday 13th, Friday 14th and Saturday 15th October with Carey Marx and Tom Lucy. Visit The Stand Comedy Club site for more details and for tickets.

Other Dates:

Friday 30th September sees me performing my very own brand of ‘cerebral filth’ (The List) at the Exchange in North Shields with Cal Halbert, him off the Mimic Men  Tickets here

Thursday 3rd November I’ll be appearing as Barry Twyord at the Aberdeen Comedy Festival.

More gig dates and comic con announcements to follow soon.

Bus-Tour Gonad and his Unfeasibly Contrived Headline


You see me, right, HIM OFF THE VIZ, I’m doing a three hour bus tour around Newcastle on 25th August, starting from the Central Station at 7pm, right. The bus is kindly provided by Tyne Idols, who do this kind of thing all the time, but with less swearing and fart jokes.

The tour will take in many of the places that contributed to the birth and growth of Newcastle’s most sweatiest ever toilet magazine. We’ll be stopping at The Gosforth Hotel, the place where Viz was first sold by my brother and me at the door of a gig by Arthur Two Stroke on the 10th of December back in 1979, and also at the Trent House, the first pub to sell Viz over the counter, these stops will allow passengers to alight and impart of refreshments, but don’t let that stop you bringing some plonk of your own to neck on the journey. Best bring some crisps too, to give the impression you care about yourself.

My constant babbling will be micro-managed by my co-conductor Alex Collier, HIM ALSO OFF THE VIZ, who will be using his big, hairy hands to push the anecdote triggering button just above my arse.

You’ll be able to buy merchandise; signed and personalised copies of my book HIM OFF THE VIZ and live DVD’s. I’ll also begrudgingly sign any old Viz tat you’d care to bring along.

I’ll also be doing a song about buses, so that’ll be nice. Or possibly not.

Tickets are £15 and are selling fast, please visit or call 0191 253 1618.

Lindisfarne Legend to Open Fundraiser

billymitchellGREAT NEWS… Billy Mitchell, former front man with North East folk rock Goliaths Lindisfarne, is to be the special guest at my Dyslexia North East fundraiser on April 1st at The Cluny2 in Newcastle. Billy has once again given his time to help raise funds for this local charity.

The multi talented entertainer will open the night with a tune or two before the rest of the music gets underway; Hannah Lamb, Acoustic Whodlums, The Purest Green and The Middens. I’ll be keeping the whole thing going with a comedy tune or two and maybe a guest spot or two with a couple of the bands. We may yet manage to get another special guest. Watch this space. TICKETS


Achris_crosslso just added to the bill is multi award winning lanky local masterful magician Chris Cross, he’ll be doing some close-up magic in the bar and a stage trick between two of the music sets. Nothing is old hat here – he’s fresh, funny & fast. Remarkable sleight of hand and mesmerising tricks.


soul_webAmongst the many items that will be auctioned on the night are a set of framed photographs kindly donated by Ian Woodcock. Very fitting for a night with so many mod connections, his fantastic photos are of Northern Soul dancers, getting the funk right out of their faces, and nearly kicking their own teeth out in the process.

SMALL_FACESSMALL FACES EXCLUSIVE… There is also an official Small Faces T-Shirt signed by Kenny Jones. I shall be bidding on this one myself.

Very generously donated by Lee Major.


Dyslexia Benefit Line-up News

North Shield’s own young faces The Middens have added the services of their ‘New Mod’ sounds to Simon’s Dyslexia North East fundraiser at The Cluny on 1st April, joining a line-up already featuring The Purest Green, Acoustic Whodlums, Hannah Lamb plus a guest or two, all hosted by Simon himself.

The Middens take influences from bands and artists spanning five decades.  For their sound, think Libertines meet The Clash with a hint of Who.  They write and play way beyond their teenage years and are now being recognised for their vibrant and energetic live shows with a growing fan base. Click on the photo above to hear and see this vibrant little outfit doing their thing.

All of this cracking entertainment for just five of your quids. Tickets HERE

A Geet Good Neet Oot

Cluny Tunes for Dyslexia North East


Simon is to dip his multi-talentless toes into the world of music when he appears as host, MC and musician at a night of maximum rhythm and booze to raise funds for Dyslexia North East, the charity of what he is proud to be patron of, and that. He’ll be knocking out a couple of his ‘comedy’ tunes and also joining the musicians for some well known songs to get the first weekend in April properly kicked off. At The Cluny 2, one of the north east’s greatest live music venues, the night features some amazing local talent in the form of Northumberland power pop trio The Purest Green, Whitley Bay’s phenomenal acousticAcoustic Whodlums (remarkably a Who tribute act with Roger Daltrey’s seal of approval) and Alnwick’s finest young talent, singer songwriter Hannah Lamb. There will also be guest appearances by some of Simon’s ‘friends’ from the world of ‘show-business’ and a great silent auction for goods and services provided to help raise funds for DNE, with some top banana prizes set to auctioned. All of this cracking entertainment for just five of your quids. Tickets HERE

More about the acts featured in the links below.

The WhodlumsFacebook Page

The Whodlums with Steve Cradock

The Purest GreenFacebook page

The Purest GreenWatching the Detectives

Hannah Lamb on YouTube

Simon Donald sings at the 100 Club